


Maybe We'll Even Be Friends Or Something

by Carerra_os



Series: Harringrove Tumblr Stories [33]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Apologies, Billy Hargrove Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Blood and Injury, Canon-Typical Violence, Drinking, First Kiss, Getting Together, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, M/M, Near Death Experiences, Neil Hargrove's A+ Parenting, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Possession, Post-Possession, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Billy Hargrove, The Sauna test works
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:13:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25873423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carerra_os/pseuds/Carerra_os
Summary: After Billy beats the shit out of Steve that November night he comes around and apologizes.-Billy does not want to be here, okay that is a lie he does want to be here, just not under these circumstances. Steve has not been in school all week and Billy cannot get that last image of Steve out of his brain. His knuckles are still raw and he knows Steve's face must be a wreck.
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington
Series: Harringrove Tumblr Stories [33]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1673560
Comments: 16
Kudos: 172





	1. Apologize

**Author's Note:**

> #40 "Don't apologize if you don't mean it."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Billy frowns and jabs the doorbell again, Steve's car is here, so there is a good chance he is too. Billy jabs it a third time and then a fourth, a little worry creeping in, he knows from Max that Steve had a head injury and he worries that maybe he went further than even he imagined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 40“Don’t apologize if you don’t mean it.”

**Maybe We'll Even Be Friends Or Something – Apologize**

Billy does not want to be here, okay that is a lie he does want to be here, just not under these circumstances. Steve has not been in school all week and Billy cannot get that last image of Steve out of his brain. His knuckles are still raw and he knows Steve's face must be a wreck.

Billy had not meant to take his shit out on Steve, would have preferred anyone other than Steve. He had just been so angry since they got here, Neil pushing his bullshit even harder on Billy and Billy having no outlets here. No place to just let go and be himself in a small town like this, they do not have the sort of bars or clubs Billy would normally find some comfort in, not in sleepy little Hawkins. So the anger had just built and built until it spilled over when Steve put himself between him and Max.

Max still will not tell him the details of that night, she does not trust him, not like she used to back in California before the anger got worse. She did tell him how bad off he left Steve though, told him about the trip they all took to the hospital after they went on their secret mission. Steve had not been able to refuse, had passed out again and Dustin had made the final decision.

Billy does not usually feel bad about things but usually when he gets in a fight the other guy actually deserves it. He has also never gone and hit someone in the face he likes. So when Max keeps giving him the cold shoulder after telling him just how bad it was Billy decides that maybe he should go see him, apologize.

Which is how Billy finds himself on Steve Harrington's front porch on a Saturday evening, a case of beer under one arm and a bag of shitty local weed in his pocket. He scuffs his toe against the bristly doormat and considers leaving. He does not wear a watch but he is pretty sure it has been over five minutes since he hit the doorbell with no sign of life.

Billy frowns and jabs the doorbell again, Steve's car is here so there is a good chance he is too. Billy jabs it a third time and then a fourth, a little worry creeping in, he knows from Max that Steve had a head injury and he worries that maybe he went further than even he imagined.

Billy does not stop until the door is being pulled open and Steve is shouting "I told you all I'm fine!" Steve freezes when his eyes land on Billy and Billy feels sick at the fear in his eyes.

He is here to say he is sorry but the words get caught in his throat, Steve looks both worse and better than he has imagined. He had not been able to quite get the location where he cracked a plate across Steve’s skull right, but here it is plain as day, six little sutures holding the skin together. Billy holds up the case of beer. "I brought beer" and muscles his way in past Steve. 

Steve seems to finally regain his senses when Billy kicks his door closed before venturing deeper into the house looking for the kitchen. "What, what are you doing?" His voice shakes and Billy is not sure if it is because he hurt his throat in the fight and forgot or if Steve really is that afraid of him now, both thoughts make his stomach roll.

Billy shifts a few things around and puts the case in the fridge taking two bottles out. He pops the cap off of and one holds it out to Steve. It is not his preferred brand, too expensive for Billy's taste but he figures Steve is probably used to drinking better stuff than the shit Billy gets. "I brought beer for you,” Billy gives a shrug "for us."

It seems like he is holding it forever, hand going clammy as he waits Steve out. Billy counts it as a win when Steve hesitantly takes the beer before turning on his heel and heading out of the room. Billy pops the cap from his own beer and follows.

Steve moves stiffly and Billy knows he must be sore, definitely remembers his knuckles connecting with Steve's ribs more than once. Steve sits on a big over stuffed couch primly, open pizza box on the coffee table, something in a language Billy does not understand playing on the TV. Steve does not tell him to leave so he takes a seat sitting closer than necessary, spreading out and taking up space until they are almost touching.

Steve gives a small huff but otherwise he ignores Billy, sipping his beer and watching the program. Billy watches Steve, he does not appear to be lost at all, seems to know exactly what is happening and Billy kind of wishes he knew what language was being spoken. When Steve grabs a piece of pizza Billy's stomach rumbles and he feels his cheeks go warm when Steve glances at him. Steve does not say anything just nudges the box in his direction and Billy takes it for the offer it is.

They sit like that for hours, until Billy is able to pick up a word or two from context clues. Until the pizza is gone, until they have gone through all of the beers and Steve tells him his weed is shity, like Billy did not already know that. It takes that long for Billy to get the words he came here to say out, Steve’s shoulder is warm against his own as he has relaxed in Billy's presence, giving Billy the courage to say what needs to be said.

"Max says I should apologize." Not what he meant to say and definitely not the right thing judging by the way Steve goes tense and pulls away from him. 

"Don't apologize if you don't mean it." Steve says moving to stand and Billy does not want that. He is quick to grab Steve's hand and it results in a pained hiss but Billy does not let go, does not want Steve to run away. It brings his eyes down, down to their hands and Billy almost forgot Steve had fought back, had given Billy some licks, his knuckles bruised and cracked too.

Billy softens his grip, runs his thumb along the edges of a bruise, gives a little tug trying to get Steve to sit back down, frowning when he does not budge. He is not pulling away though and Billy takes a few moments to collect his thoughts, hoping the words he intends come out this time. Billy bends, eyes getting a good look at the oversized knit socks Steve dug out twenty minutes ago when he got too cold before they fall closed and he presses their clasped hands to his forehead.

"No." Billy gives a false start heaves out a heavy sigh clutching Steve's hand a little tighter. Steve remains still like a statue and Billy kind of wishes he knew whether Steve is looking down at him or not but he is too afraid to look up and check. "That's not." The, why I'm here, why I’m doing this, gets caught in his throat. 

Billy hopes Steve gets it anyway, the only times he ever actually apologizes with words is when he is under duress from his father. Somehow it is so much harder when the threat of pain is not there, the words feel foreign in his throat. Usually he apologizes with things, gets Max a comic book when he has been too much of an asshole, got her a new skateboard this time because it was worse than all of the other times, so much worse.

"I'm sorry." Billy rasps out as the crack of a gunshot and a woman screaming sounds through the speakers of the TV before a little dramatic beat and then the commercials are playing and it is suddenly too loud. Billy is afraid he will miss it if Steve decides to speak.

Steve is quiet and still until the commercial ends and he flops down on the couch next to Billy nearly as close as before. "Alright." Billy finally takes a breath, he did not realize he had been holding his breath until Steve spoke, Steve shifts pulling his legs up, his shoulder pressing firmly against Billy's. "I guess we could do this again sometime."

"You forgive me?" Billy asks dumbfounded he hoped but he figured like most things in life things were not going to work out in his favor.

"Fuck no, it's been less than a week." Steve barks out a harsh laugh, before shrugging. "Eventually I could, gonna need some time, my face is one giant ache man." Billy stares down at his hand still clasping Steve's, stares down at their matching knuckles. 

"Maybe we'll even be friends or something. Not today but down the line." Billy can work with that, will take what is offered and try and ignore the hope in his belly that something could be more than friends, that someday comes sooner rather than later.

"Alright yeah, in the meantime you want to take pity on me and tell me what's going on in this show?" Billy asks, throat still a little tight but Steve tips his head back and laughs before launching into an explanation, hand still clasped in Billy's.

- **TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://ghostofjellyfishforgotten.tumblr.com/


	2. Someday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey Billy.” Steve calls as he rounds the corner and sees Billy’s back, his silhouette lit by moonlight, cigarette hanging at his side, cheery burning bright. Steve slides the back door open, he never does the lock up, half the time he finds Dustin taking a nap on his couch, but Dustin is off at camp so the only person who has been showing up unannounced is Billy. Steve leans in the door and flips the light on, casts a warm yellow glow that makes the shadows grow and stretch over the pool.
> 
> Steve shivers, he does not like being back here, but when Billy is around it is not as bad. “Billy come inside when you’re done with your smoke, its hot out here, I’m going to change.” Steve says waiting till Billy grunts at him before heading in. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #38 "You leave whenever you feel like it."

**Maybe We’ll Even Be Friends Or Something - Someday**

Steve gets off late from Scoops, Robin having ducked out early to go meet up with Heather, all giddy and excited and Steve was too happy for her to make her stay and finish cleaning with him. He is not expecting company, was planning to grab a quick meal and a hot shower before burying himself under his blankets but there is a familiar Camaro parked in his drive. Steve parks next to Billy’s Camaro skipping the front door, already knowing Billy will be out back sitting on a pool chair smoking.

“Hey Billy.” Steve calls as he rounds the corner and sees Billy’s back, his silhouette lit by moonlight, cigarette hanging at his side, cheery burning bright. Steve slides the back door open, he never does the lock up, half the time he finds Dustin taking a nap on his couch but Dustin is off at camp so the only person who has been showing up unannounced is Billy. Steve leans in the door and flips the light on, casts a warm yellow glow that makes the shadows grow and stretch over the pool.

Steve shivers, he does not like being back here but when Billy is around it is not as bad. “Billy come inside when you’re done with your smoke, it's hot out here, I’m going to change.” Steve says waiting until Billy grunts at him before heading in.

Since Billy showed up at his house after that night in November he has become a regular presence in Steve’s life. Most nights he is talkative and full of action, dragging Steve out of his loneliness even when they stay at the house but other nights he is quiet, with fresh bruises that he will not talk about. Steve prefers the nights where Billy is full of life, happy, nights like this there is a sadness that threatens to drown him and Steve does not know how to fix it.

Steve changes and by the time he gets back down stairs Billy is inside leaning against the kitchen counter with a beer pressed against his swollen eye. Steve’s throat feels tight, he has never seen him looking this bad, he has a fat lip to match his eye and blood dried cracking down his lips from his nose and cuts along his face.

“What the fuck happened Billy?” Steve asks, digging in the freezer and dumping ice into a kitchen towel and gently moving the beer from Billy’s face replacing it. Billy shrugs and Steve feels frustration bubble up in his chest. "Hold this." Steve jostles the ice against his eye and Billy hisses as it agitates.

"Careful." Billy practically growls as he takes the cloth full of ice. Steve purses his lips as he wets another kitchen towel with warm water.

“I wouldn’t have to be careful if you’d stop getting in fights.” Steve mumbles ignoring the glower Billy sends his way as he starts gently wiping at the blood caked to Billy’s skin. Billy just grunts and averts his eyes as Steve keeps gently working away at the red staining his skin. The flesh underneath most of the blood is starting to purple, cracked open in spots and Steve has to apply pressure to a few areas when new blood starts flowing.

He does not like seeing Billy like this, beaten and bruised, somber in a way he usually is not. Nights like these Steve wonders about the unspoken things, because Billy might not talk about his home life but Max, Max has alluded to some stuff. Steve's parents are never around but they would never hurt him physically, he is pretty sure the same cannot be said about Neil Hargrove. It makes worry and sadness crawl up his throat, he does not understand why Billy stays, he is eighteen now, he could leave.

“Why you crying pretty boy?” Billy croaks and Steve does not realize he worked himself up to tears until Billy speaks, hand coming up and thumbing at a wet track sliding down Steve’s cheek. It is intimate in a way Billy gets some times, usually only when Steve is having a bad night and he needs that extra closeness to feel grounded, usually when they have broken out the good booze from Steve’s parents’ liquor cabinet and Steve knows it is a tell that Billy has picked up on.

“I’m not crying.” Steve lies sniffing as he wipes at his eyes. “I’m just worried about you asshole, I don’t like seeing you hurt.” Steve hates that his lower lip is wobbling, pulls it between his teeth to stop the shake as he turns away from Billy. “I’m going to get the first aid kit, some of these need antiseptic and bandages.”

“Don’t have to worry about me. I'm tough, not one of your kids.” Billy says gruffly and Steve can practically hear the smirk in his voice and he kind of hopes it stings as Billy follows him towards the bathroom.

“My kids are plenty tough! You have no idea and don’t try to change the subject.” Steve hisses, as he bangs around under the bathroom sink.

“Going to start mother hening me like you do them?” Billy asks less gruff, more fondly teasing and some of the worry in Steve eases at the playful tone.

“Well someone has to, you clearly can’t take care of yourself.” Steve insists as he pushes Billy to sit. Billy lets the ice drop from his face, ice clinking together as he settles the makeshift ice pack on the ledge of the sink. Steve gently pushes Billy’s curls from his face, fingers lingering gently as Billy leans into it.

"Why do you care so much?" Billy asks softly, looking up at Steve through his lashes as Steve moves his hand away digging out the antiseptic and wetting a cotton swab.

"We're you know, like friends, I dunno, maybe more." Steve shrugs, shushing Billy when he hisses at the sting of antiseptic, bating his hand away when he tries to stop him from cleaning out the cut over his eye.

Steve is done with the antiseptic and smoothing silly cartoon bandages El had picked out over Billy’s cuts before he asks. "Maybe more?" Steve squirms a little, dropping his hands from Billy’s face only for Billy to grab one, calloused fingers holding tight, thumb rubbing at the knobs of Steve’s knuckles.

Steve hums looking at Billy's hand holding his, "maybe, too soon to tell." It has been a few months since Billy showed up and apologized and started all of this and they are definitely friends and Steve definitely has feelings but there are still a lot of unsaid things between them.

"Doesn't have to be." Billy tries earnestly and Steve feels bad that he cannot give him what he wants but there is still too much space between them, space Steve cannot fill in yet because there are terrible things in Hawkins that luckily Billy does not know the horrors of.

“But it is." Billy nods once sharply and Steve knows he does not like the answer but he does not press, just keeps holding Steve’s hand.

“Someday then.” Billy says standing and dragging Steve out of the bathroom and to the couch before he can even throw away the little paper tabs from the bandages still scattered on the counter.

“Will you tell me who did this?” Steve asks, breaking away from Billy briefly to grab them both a beer from the fridge and grab a throw from the chair before settling on the couch with him. Billy breathes heavily through his nose, taking a long sip from the bottle before taking the blanket from Steve and draping it over the both of them, the temperature down low in the house to defend against the summer heat.

“Just got in a fight, drop it.” Billy says a hard edge to his voice that Steve knows better than to cross.

“Okay,” Steve says flipping on the television and switching to one of his programs, he usually ends up spending most of the time explaining what is going on to Billy but Billy is starting to pick up more and more of the words and he seems to like it when Steve explains it to him. Steve likes the feeling that flutters in his chest when Billy looks at him softly while he tells him about whatever plot is unfolding on the screen.

Steve hesitated before jumping into tonight's show, giving Billy a considering look before speaking, fingers nervously peeling the label from his bottle. “ **You leave whenever you feel like it** but you can stay, stay as long as you need, as long as you want. It’s only me here anymore. My folks don’t bother coming home, you can take any room you want, if you like.” Steve offers.

Billy is looking at him with something Steve cannot quite decipher before his face goes impossibly soft, a smile tugging at his lips and Steve, knows it must sting as he watches a little bead of blood push out. “Maybe someday.” Billy hums out, sliding an arm across the back of the couch around Steve’s shoulders and pulling him until their sides are touching and warmth floods through Steve’s chest. “Now tell me what I missed when I didn’t come by yesterday. Did she catch him in the act?” Billy asks, Steve just grins and launches into a retelling of yesterday's episode.

**-TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://ghostofjellyfishforgotten.tumblr.com/


	3. The Distance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sauna works and the mind flyer is purged from Billy and now he knows what Steve has been hiding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #89 “and when did you plan on telling me about this?

**Maybe We’ll Even Be Friends Or Something - The Distance**

It is hot to hot, Billy can feel that violent sentient things rolling inside of him, can hear it using his feelings in a plea to be freed. It has been nearly a week of being trapped in his own head, watching it push away the best thing that has ever happened to him and subject countless others to Billy’s own fate. Billy is just glad Steve is not one of those added to its horde, even if watching his face crumple as the flyer pushed him away broke Billy’s heart.

He feels like he is burning up, boiling and only part of that is from being trapped in the sauna for this long. He can hear the monster screaming in his head even as it continues trying to put on a show, tries to ply Max with tears before moving on to Steve when it does not get it anything. Billy can see Steve outside the little window, arms curled around himself trying to make himself smaller, hunched in and looking worse for wear and Billy aches for the pain this has caused him, is continuing to cause him.

Things had been going good, they still are not together but they were getting there. Billy had been an idiot though, had gotten in his head about Steve not being able to hangout last Saturday. Had decided to do something stupid and impulsive and in his anger he decided to invite Mrs. Wheeler to a motel. She cannot help looking and Billy knows exactly the sort of effect he has on her and he was feeling insecure after Steve bailed on the night they always, always hangout for his coworker of all people, Billy had decided to give Mrs. Wheeler what he knows she wants.

He never did meet Mrs. Wheeler, he had talked himself out of it halfway to the motel, he knew Steve just wanted to be friends with his coworker, that his excitement over hanging out with her was not a personal slight. He had pulled a sharp U-turn planning to go back home, he did not want to go through with his impulsive distraction anymore. That is when the monster got him, when his car crashed and it struck and Billy has been trapped in his own head ever since. Thankful when for whatever reason the flayer chose not to take Steve.

Billy does not remember everything but he distinctly remembers the looks on Steve’s face when the mind flayer had shoved him away, when it had told him to stop bothering him. Billy had been screaming on the inside, he had tried to fight its hold as soon as Steve showed up at the pool that morning. Anger and rage rolled in him when Steve grabbed for him, only to be knocked back, looking fragile, looking like he was about to cry, darting away before things could get worse. Steve had not come back, had chosen to give Billy space. Billy was thankful for Steve’s caution, he did not want things to get worse, did not want to see him flayed or worse killed.

Steve is back now though, just outside the tiny window crying again, Billy is always making him cry one way or another.

The burning is getting worse, his head is pounding, he barely registers the thing crashing through the little sauna window trying to reach for the kids, Steve, anyone. Steve pulls the kids back, a curly haired girl Billy has a vague memory of standing at his side ready to defend. It keeps fighting against the door, but it is weaker, Billy’s body getting hotter with each passing moment, even with the tiny vent of fresh air, the heat is becoming too much and Billy hears himself screaming before his vision goes black.

-

Billy comes to a short while later, head pounding, throat dry, definitely overheated but it is gone. That monster that has been living under his skin, keeping him dormant in his own brain is gone, he cannot feel it anymore. Billy blinks as something cool and wet presses to his face, groaning as he opens his eyes and his vision spots. “Easy, easy.” Steve, it is Steve over him with a cool cloth, tear stains down his face.

Billy chokes on words, his throat dry and scratching like he has not had water in days, probably because he has not. Max is pressed against his chest, hugging him, her curls sticking to his skin and it is too hot but he does not push her way, cards a hand through her hair as Steve helps him lift his head and presses a bottle of cold water to his lips. Billy takes a few sips before pausing, as much as he wants to gulp it all down, he does not want to make himself sick. 

“Someone want to tell me what the hell that thing was?” Billy is really directing it at Steve who looks guilty, moving back a little with a flinch. Billy does not let him get far, grabs him by the wrist holding him in place, Steve opens his mouth to speak only for the kids to start explaining over each other.

Billy listens as best he can, taking more sips of water when Steve holds the bottle to his mouth between replacing the cool cloth on his head, sometimes wiping at his brow or chest in an effort to help Billy cool off. He gets the gist of it, and even after being possessed by an interdimensional monster it is still a little boggling. The thing Billy’s brain really latches onto is that this, this is what has been keeping distance between him and Steve, this is the unspoken thing keeping Steve from letting him in completely. 

**“And when did you plan on telling me about this?”** Billy asks, giving Steve’s wrist a gentle squeeze when he goes nervous, licking at his lips and squirming where he kneels next to Billy.

“I was kind of hoping you never got dragged into this shit show.” Steve admits, and yeah on one hand Billy wishes that too but on the other hand, he gets why Steve hates his little backyard and pool, why he keeps the lights on when he is home now. The shadows under his eyes, the fact that Billy can just show up in the middle of the night and has somehow never once woken Steve up, because he is awake already. It makes how deeply Steve sleeps when he nods off against Billy’s side mean something deeper than it did before, the found warmth Billy always carries for Steve curling deep in his chest.

“Now I know.” Billy says, holding Steve’s wrist a little tighter for a second before letting it go, pushing Max gently off of him so he can stand, tired of the tile against his back. He needs a shower and clothes, more water and food. He needs a bed, and hopefully a warm body to curl to when he is not quite so hot himself.

“Yeah,” Steve watches Billy stand hands out to catch him in case his steps falter, the rest of the kids still muttering behind them, Dustin giving the two of them suspicious looks. Max’s hand finds his, holding tight and refusing to let go, glaring at him when he tries to get his hand back. Billy huffs out a sigh, he is still far too hot but he pulls her into his side anyway, lets her curl her arms around his waist, resting his own arm against her shoulders. "What do you need, just tell me what you need."

“Take me home.” Billy sees the way Steve hunches, the way his eyes go wet and knows he misunderstood. “Take me home with you pretty boy.” Billy says before Steve can work himself up to actual tears, he has cried enough because of Billy.

“Yeah, yeah I can do that.” Steve says, voice still wet, lower lip still wobbling and Billy wants to pull him close but they have an audience and he does not want all of the kids knowing their business. 

"I'm staying at your house!" Dustin shouts with a conspiratorial look, like Steve should know this and a glare at Billy like he is in the way. Billy is instantly suspicious, of the looks he keeps shooting Steve, there is more he does not know about but he can wait until they are alone and then press Steve to reveal the rest of his secrets to him.

“I’m coming too!” Max says with determination and Billy knows trying to drop her back at home will not work. Not that it matters Susan is not there and Neil is doubtful to question either of their absences without his wife in attendance. With her insistence comes the rest of the kids demanding to sleep over as well and Dustin whining at Steve with more of those looks. 

"Knock it off Dustin or I'm taking you back to your house." Steve hisses when Dustin keeps going, starts bitching up a storm. Even feeling shitty and spent Billy still feels a little smile tugging at his lips at Steve defending him to his favorite kid.

-

Billy takes a shower while Steve sets the kids up down stairs, he can hear more arguing from Dustin before he closes the door and steps under the spray. It is cool and exactly what he needs, he takes the opportunity to use Steve’s fancy products, enjoying the smell of them and wishes he was smelling them on Steve instead. He deliberately focuses on that and not the little flashes of memory trying to eat at him, thoughts of Steve are enough at the moment to keep them at bay.

There are clothes already waiting for him on the edge of the sink and Billy towels his hair dry before pulling them on. The pants are a little long and tight in the thighs but they are soft and comfortable, not made of anything too warm. Billy ends up dumping the shirt back on the counter, he is still a little too warm and it is definitely too snug in the chest and arms.

“Hey.” Steve calls from his bedroom when Billy walks past heading down to look for him, doubles back and leans against the doorway, watching the way the lamp light casts shadows against Steve’s skin. “Come here, let me patch you up.” Steve pats the bed next to him and Billy spots the little first aid kit on the nightstand waiting.

Billy hums, stomach fluttering as he takes a seat, Steve’s fingers gentle as they brush over his skin, applying a bandage here and there and cream for the abrasions. Steve is quiet while he works, Billy can feel the tremor running through his hands as he finishes, feels Steve’s forehead land between his shoulder blades. Hand reaching forward for one of Billy’s and Billy twines their fingers, holding tight. “I’m sorry.” Is whispered against his skin and there Steve goes crying again.

“Why you apologizing pretty boy?” Billy’s gut tightens as Steve’s other arm comes around his waist pulling until Billy shuffles his body back a little. He meets Steve half way, lets him curl to his backs, dropping his free hand down to link the fingers of their other hands too. 

“I’m sorry this fucking happened to you.” Steve says harshly against Billy’s back, tears dripping down his spine as they fall from Steve’s eyes.

“If it hadn’t would you have ever told me?” Billy already knows the answer, if Steve were going to tell him about the shit show that is Hawkins’ true self he would have done it back on that November night instead of lying to Billy about Max. Or that night when Billy apologized, if he were going to ever tell him, surely that would have been the day.

“Would you have believed me?” Steve asks and that is fair, even if it angers Billy that Steve has been sitting on all this horror by himself. Been dealing with the trauma on his own, because Billy knows he is not telling the kids how messed up he actually is over it, is not going to Wheeler and Byers to talk about his problems.

Billy does not answer, instead he twists, until they are facing, pulling Steve’s face up to meet his, thumbs rubbing away tears as they keep falling. “Is it still too soon?” Billy asks, he really hopes it is not, even as he knows they still have a lot to talk about and he is angry that Steve kept all of this bottled up and to himself but he also gets it. They are a lot alike in that department, keeping their pain close to the chest, instead of revealing it to others.

“When the kids came and told me, what was really going on with you, I was terrified.” Steve whispers, shaking “I thought I’d missed my chance.” Billy’s gut is filled with warmth, as Steve leans in that little bit, salt on his lips as he presses a chaste kiss against Billy’s. Today, this whole week has been hell but if this is the outcome Billy would weather it again.

**-TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://ghostofjellyfishforgotten.tumblr.com/


	4. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You alright pretty boy? They caught you pretty hard in the back of the head.” Billy ventures, voice a little raspy and words a little slurred and Steve fears he has a concussion but there is no way he can check in their current position.

****Maybe We'll Even Be Friends Or Something –** Home**

Pain, Steve's whole face is pain as the Russians drag him into a different room, a room that has Billy tied to a chair, blood trickling from his swollen nose. Steve thrashes, he wants to check on him, make sure he is alright. That he is going to survive this, has Billy not been through enough this week.

All that trashing gets Billy to lift his head at least and he gives Steve a bloody smile that soothes just as much as it angers. Steve is not sure what he is saying at he makes threats he has no follow through for but the knock at the back of his head is jarring, it quiets him and gives their captors enough time to tie him to a chair just like Billy. He can feel Billy's hands tied against his own behind their backs and Steve squirms his fingers until he can wrap his pinkie around one of Billy's fingers as their captors shuffle out. Billy squeezes back and Steve feels like he can finally breathe again, a feeling that does not come easily down here.

“You alright pretty boy? They caught you pretty hard in the back of the head.” Billy ventures, voice a little raspy and words a little slurred and Steve fears he has a concussion but there is no way he can check in their current position.

“I’ll be fine…” Steve trails off throat tight with worry and tears stinging his eyes threatening to spill, he never should have told Billy about this, never should have let Dustin convince him investigating a secret Russian code was a good idea. “How are you doing?” He chokes out, Billy squeezing his pinkie again, rubbing it over every bit of Steve’s fingers he can reach and it makes Steve feel a little better.

“I’m fine now that I know you’re okay.” Billy says, tipping his head back until it rests against the back of Steve and that, that helps too, grounds Steve even more and he does not feel quite so much like his tears are coming up to choke him. 

Their quiet moment is interrupted as men spill into the room, a man in a weird plastic apron over scrubs following them, Steve’s gut clenches unpleasantly as the man heads over to a cart full of medical equipment, gloved fingers ghosting over the instruments. There is a giant needle, Steve fucking hates needles, has never had the stomach for shots, it makes bile rise in his throat. Billy’s fingers are still wrapped around his squeezing, trying to offer reassurance and it is on then that Steve realizes he is shaking.

That fear shifts as the man the rest are all taking orders from starts talking and Steve just assumes he is talking about Billy when he talks about “The pretty one”, he is gorgeous of course he is talking about Billy. Steve goes mean mouthed, cursing up a storm trying to pull that attention away from Billy, he does not want Billy to hurt anymore, he just wants to protect him. 

Steve blinks caught off guard as a hand caresses his face, gentle in a way that makes fear for himself prick trickle in. Steve hisses in pain as a thumb suddenly digs in against his bleeding lip, the man laughing and calls him the pretty one before his other hand fists in Steve’s hair and wrenches his head to the side, neck taunt. Billy is shouting but Steve cannot make out the words over the sound of his own heart trying to beat through his chest. The needle feels impossibly long as it goes in, burning as whatever was in the syringe is pushed into him. The men around them are laughing, a hand still stroking and Steve’s tries to reassure Billy that he is okay without words. Billy’s fingers stroke his in return and sound is rushing back in as Billy hisses in pain as he gets an injection of his own.

Things start going fuzzy before the men all shuffle out of the room, Steve feels hot and woozy but also giggly and light, as if his fears and worries have washed away. He knows words are coming out of his and Billy’s mouths and giggles but he cannot really wrap his head around what they are saying. The only thing that really registered is the feel of Billy’s fingers twined awkwardly with his, the brush of golden curls against his neck, the back of Billy’s head pressed against his own.

At some point they try to escape, at least he thinks that is what they were trying to do, everything is off kilter and fuzzy, it is hard to focus. All he knows is that they end up on the ground, still tied to their chairs and one another, the pain lacing up the right side of his body is dull and Steve thinks it must be whatever they gave him keeping it form getting worse because it is almost as dull as the ache in his head. 

Wherever they gave him is really starting to take effect now, things all blurring together. He closes his eyes for a second and the next thing he knows they are back in the elevator. He is nearly on his back in the corner, propped up partially against the wall, Billy’s head in his lap, his fingers tangled in golden curls. He is distantly aware of Dustin yelling at him but his focus is on Billy, on the reddish tinge to his curls staining them pinkish, he distantly thinks the color is pretty but it also makes him sad and he cannot put his finger on why.

Steve has no idea how they end up in the movie theater, Billy and him at one end Robin and the kids on the other side of the row. At one point they had tried separating them but Billy had held on tight, fingers biting into Steve’s arm hard enough to notice even in his hazy state and they had given up. They are stuffing their mouths with popcorn, heads pressed together as they watch something, Steve has no idea what is going on but it is nice being at a theater with Billy, they have not done that before.

The haze does not leave as Billy drags him out of the theater and it only gets worse when they stare up at the glass ceiling, his stomach rolls and Steve rushes to the bathroom, Billy only a few steps away from him as they both get sick. It does not help make anything clearer but at least he stops feeling like his stomach is trying to crawl up his throat as he sits on the floor pressing his feet against Billy’s until they are found by Robin.

-

They had left the mall, why did they come back again? Steve cannot really remember the exact reason all he knows is it had been important, that he need to and Billy would not let him come along. Seeing the mind flayer move to impale him Steve wishes he had stayed behind, back where it was relatively safe. Steve does not realize he has moved, not until the pain hits him, too much for the drugs to dull.

Someone is screaming, maybe several someones, Steve is not sure as he looks down at the gooey tentacle like appendage impaling him. It hurts a lot, hurts even more when it rips back out of him as the thing makes an unholy screeching noise as it starts to wither. Steve feels like he is choking, like something is bubbling up as he falls toward his knees, strong arms catching him before they can connect with unforgiving marble. 

There is a lot of blood seeping through his shirt, dripping down those arms as he is lower to the floors and there is that ceiling again, just as shiny as before and Steve feels not sick but not well as he blinks up at it. Someone is talking, a lot of people are talking but Steve only really tunes into one voice, his favorite voice. His view of the ceiling is blocked and something wet drips against his face and it takes him a moment to register it is Billy crying above him, mouth moving and lights framing him like a halo of sunshine.

Steve frowns, Billy should not be crying, he does not want Billy to cry. Steve struggles to get his arm to move and it feels like it takes an eternity as the room get fuzzier, going a little gray around the edges. Billy’s lips stop moving when Steve’s hand finally makes contact, he brushes at the tears with his thumb, mouth too wet as he struggles to speak. Steve cannot even hear his own words as things start fading out more and he is cold everywhere Billy is not touching him. Steve’s world fades to black as Billy’s mouth starts moving again. 

-

Things come back slow and unfamiliar, well there is one familiar thing, Billy, Billy is set up in a chair hunched over, head on the edge of the bed. Steve blinks around the room, to the machines beeping in time with his own heartbeat and he finally figures out where he is as he tracks the wires on the machine back to his own body. Steve feels his heart rate pick up the beeping of the machines following suit as he remembers why he is here. 

Steve struggles to get his hand from under Billy to bring both of them up so he can check himself, waking Billy in the process. He is pulling at the scratchy hospital robe trying to see where he was struck so he can assess the damage for himself when hands grab his and he fights it, as he gets flashes of memory. A bright light above him and masked face looking down at him, talking over him and pain. “Hey, hey you're okay, you’re okay pretty boy.” Steve sucks in a breath calming a little as he realizes it is Billy’s hands holding him as tears drip down his cheeks, he is crying again. 

“You’re crying?” Steve says frowning as he tries to blink the lingering sleep out of his eyes, stopping his struggle completely and twisting his fingers with Billy’s.

“You weren’t awake to do the crying someone had to fill the void.” Billy chokes out, pressing closer and climbing onto the bed, it hurts a little but Steve does not dare say anything as Billy hides his teary face in his neck.

-

They keep him for nearly a month, it is awful except Billy, Billy is with him every day, he leaves for work sometimes but he comes back right after. So while Steve is looking forward to going home and sleeping in his own bed, well the couch, he still is not supposed to climb up and down the stairs but it is still better than the stiff hospital bed that his ass has practically molded to, he is going to miss Billy being around all of the time.

"Is it someday yet?" Steve asks, licking his lips nervously as Billy tosses their accumulated belongings into two bags while Steve sits on the edge of the hospital bed kicking his feet.

Billy pauses, head quirking to the side in a way that makes a smile pull at Steve’s lips, h is cute when he is confused. The grin that breaks across Billy’s lips has Steve’s stomach flipping. “Yeah, I think it is, what room should I move my stuff in?” 

"Any room you want." Steve returns that grin as Billy moves closer hand out and grabbing Billy’s wrist drawing him to stand between his knees.

“Think I’ll just share yours.” Billy licks over his lips and Steve cannot help the way his eyes are drawn to its path.

“Good I couldn’t bear you sleeping anywhere else.” Steve says, voice a little breathy in his elation as he draws Billy into a kiss. They regretful keep it chased, they have both been scolded more than once by Steve’s doctor and the nurses.

  
“Let’s go home pretty boy.” Home yeah Steve cannot wait to go _home_ with Billy.

**-End**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://ghostofjellyfishforgotten.tumblr.com/

**Author's Note:**

> https://ghostofjellyfishforgotten.tumblr.com/


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